The pastors of all the Valley Life Churches asked me to put together a few questions for married couples to work through after the “Married Nights” sermon from our current sermon series, Better Together. I’m thankful for the help of my wife, Brooke, in putting these together. We recognize that what you hear on Sunday is the starting point for real change to happen in your marriage, and we encourage you to take some time together with your spouse to let these few questions be the beginning of a good long conversation.

Questions for Spouses

Are we as close/connected (body and souls) as we have ever been? When were we more connected? Why do you think we were closer then?

Where would you like to grow in our communication about sex: before, during, or after?

Are your delighted with your body?

Are you disappointed with your body?

Do you feel defensive about your body?

How have I contributed to your delight, disappointment, or defensiveness?

The king says his bride is a mare among pharaoh’s chariots or is a lily among brambles. When have my words been brought us closer together? When have my words made us further apart?

The sermon said that sex is for self disclosure. Does it feel to you, at this point in our marriage, that I really know you?

What does it seem to you that I struggle to understand about our sex life?

Brian Bowman

Brian Bowman

Brian Bowman is the pastor of Valley Life | Tramonto, the first Valley Life Church planted in 2012. He planted his first NAMB church in 2004 in Portland, OR. Brian also writes for the Send Network Blog and Acts 29.